September is here!

Well I am not a regular blogger but I sure am glad that I created this blog when I did. I love looking back and seeing what I have accomplished. As disappointing as last year was in terms of the weight-gain, I am really proud that I have managed to maintain this weight for almost a year now. That is unprecedented for me. It seems I am either gaining or losing, never the same. It's good to know that I am capable of maintaining a weight - just I don't want it to be this weight. I know that it takes persistance to get to goal and I have that. I need to keep focused.

So this week I have been looking at what has been going on. It seems I get close to 250, and then sabotage myself and scoot back up. I really think that I am so worried I won't be able to reach goal or maintain the weight loss that I am holding myself back rather than be disappointed later. I need to challenge this thinking.

I know that I don't feel good at this weight. I would like to improve my health to the point that I require no medication to manage my blood pressure. Also, I feel uncomfortable and really want to get back into the clothes I was wearing when I was at 200 lbs. I have some really cute things and I really liked how I felt at that weight.

This week I started following the Body for Life plan but then had a setback with my back. I have continued with doing the activity that I can and I will just keep on plugging along. The reason I started back on the BFL plan is that I love how I feel from all the weights and cardio. I feel strong and fit which is really one of my goals. This is a 12-week plan to help me refocus on regular activity and healthy eating.

To help stay focused, I have joined some challenges: September SWLC - get under 250; Halloween Hotties - down to 242 (100 lbs lost from highest known weight); and of course my Long Term Challenge that goes to New Years to re-earn my WW 100-lb milestone. Currently I am unlikely to meet the LTC but I will get closer and I absolutely can and will meet the SWLC and Halloween challenges.

It is time to break out and break free from where I am. It is time to challenge the negative thinking and really focus. I am the only one holding me back - no one else. For me to get the results I used to get, I need to do what I used to do. As Dr. Phil says, "the best predictor of future behaviour, is past behaviour." That is hopeful as I know that I have done this before, therefore it is entirely within my power to do it again. :)

Anyhow, this is a big ramble to let you all know where I am sitting right now. I have been stuck here for almost a year but I will break through any barriers that are keeping me from reaching my goals. :)