I am worth the effort!

Well there it is. I absolutely needed to have one good day and I've done that. I have a snack planned for tonight and if I want more, well then it will be water, hot decaf tea and bed if necessary. I could use the sleep for sure.

I have to say I loved watching the Jenny Craig "Touchstones for Success" dvd last night. It is with Martha Beck who appears on Oprah and is in O Magazine. She covered different mindsets that can hinder success in weight-loss.

The two that really related were: Becoming the Compassionate Observer and Breaking the Binge Cycle.

Becoming the Compassionate Observer is about recognizing that there are is a war going on regularly with two voices - the Restrictor who is always wanting the perfect weight-loss day and is critical when we fail, and the Rebel who fights again the Restrictor.

Martha Beck explained the place of peace is when you can observe the war compassionately, recognizing and empathizing with both sides - the rebel who wants to do what it wants to do (eat everything in sight and not exercise) and the Restrictor who wants you to lose weight perfectly, eat perfectly, never miss a workout and criticizes (You're so fat, look at you, you'll never be different). She says both have a role and once we can watch them and relate to both sides, we can find some balance.

Breaking the Binge Cycle had an interesting exercise. You draw a vertical line through a paper and write with your dominant hand (for me the right hand) on the right side. You start a conversation with the "Binger." So on the right "Hello how are you?" Then on the left side of the page with your other hand (for me the left hand) you respond "Okay." And then you keep the conversation going. "Are you planning to keep binging." "Yes probably." The one question Martha Beck said to ask was "How old are you?" and the answer for me as "10" which is really telling as that is the age I was when I started struggling with my weight. The she said to ask "What is you want?" and keep answering the questions "Peace".

It was an interesting exercise and actually ended up showing me that right now I feel vulnerable and want to be protected and feel some peace. Based on what's going on in my life right now, it made sense. I have to say the exercise felt uncomfortable but it did show me something. I will likely use it again when I am in a binge cycle.

Anyhow, today has been a good day. I weighed in and reported honestly my weight to my JC consultant and to the WW boards. That was a huge step for me. And then the rest came into line - planning, journalling, drinking the water. All the things I know are good for me. I was happy about that.

Yesterday watching that DVD, I came up with the affirmation for this week: "I am worth the effort!" and I believe that right now. I deserve good health and I deserve to feel good about myself so I will do the things that make that happen.